So Far Away
by Fire Of The Stars
Summary: Harry is making the ultimate sacrifice. As he nears his final battle, he thinks about what has brought him to this point. Songfic to "When I'm Gone" by 3 doors down


  


_There's another world inside of me that you will never see,_

_there's secrets in this life that I can't hide._

_Somewhere in this darkness, there's a light that I can't find . . ._

  


Harry walked down the dark, cold corridor. His heart was racing, his blood pounding in his veins. It was time. There was no more hiding from this. It was his destiny, as Dumbledore had told him. Dumbledore, the greatest wizard who ever lived. Harry had seen him die, seen his face go blank and cold. And it had been his fault. Dumbledore had died protecting him, as so many before him had died for the same reason. Their devotion to Harry had been their downfall. His parents had died protecting him. Sirius had been tortured because he was close to Harry, subjected to the Cruciatus Curse for several months before being put out of his misery. Ginny had been missing for weeks, and was presumed dead. Because Harry had loved her. Tears stung his eyes as he saw her face. She was only sixteen. She had her whole life ahead of her. But she would never get to experience it, and it was his fault. 

  


_Maybe it's too far away,_

_or maybe I'm just blind . . ._

  


These thoughts filled Harry with deep grief, but he would not push them away. He would use the pain for fuel. The grief was only rivaled by the rage burning in him. It was a fire that would not be extinguished until the person responsible was dead. No more would die because of Harry. He was the target, and he was bringing himself within shooting range. He had been planning it since Ginny had gone missing. He had begun to drift away from Ron and Hermione, living in his thoughts. Dumbledore had called him to his office several times, offering his guidance. But Harry had never heard any of it. He regretted it now. He had put off this day until Dumbledore had died. Harry had seen the Death Eater raise his wand, and had tried to disarm him, but was thrown against the wall and held there by invisible bonds. He could do nothing but watch, horrified, as the green light filled the room. 

  


_So hold me when I'm here,_

_right me when I'm wrong,_

_hold me when I'm scared,_

_and love me when I'm gone . . ._

  


Harry was nearing his destination, the pain of his scar ripping through him. He heard a high, cold voice and saw a large group of figures clad in black robes. He drew his wand, adrenaline rushing through him. He thought of Ron and Hermione, knew that they were worried. They had begged him not to go. They were both terrified. They did not understand that he was doing this to save them, as they had saved him so many times. He took a deep breath and pointed his wand at the Death Eaters. 

  


"Expelliarmus!"

  


They whirled on him as their wands piled in front of him. Red eyes narrowed. 

  


"Ah, Harry. How nice of you to join us. I was wondering when you would come," Voldemort hissed.

  


"Tell them to go. I want to fight you, and you only," Harry spat. Voldemort looked impressed. He dismissed the Death Eaters with a wave of his hand.

  


"So, you have finally decided to face the inevitable" the cold voice said.

  


"No talking, _Tom_," Harry hissed through clenched teeth. "Are we going to duel or not?"

  


_Everything I am and everything in me, _

_wants to be the one you wanted me to be._

_I'll never let you down, and even if I could,_

_I'd give up everything if only for your good . . ._

  


Harry writhed in pain as the Cruciatus Curse took full effect. His nose was bleeding from trying to throw it off, but his right hand was still gripping his wand tightly. He didn't know of any curses that he could use against Voldemort. None but the Unforgivable Curses, which he refused to use. He felt the curse lift, and heard Voldemort's laughter. 

  


"When are you going to give up? Silly boy, you will die just like your father. Your Gryffindor blood can't help you now."

  


"My dad was braver than you will ever be,"Harry said, wiping his blood on the sleeves of his robe.

  


"How very sweet. Well, Harry, you will know your father soon, because you shall join him. And your pathetic friends will be next." 

  


Harry felt the rage build inside of him once again. Voldemort continued to taunt him, threatening Ron and Hermione, and an idea began to form inside Harry. He pointed his wand at Voldemort, careful that the movement was not very noticeable. 

  


"Expelliarmus," he whispered. Voldemort looked stunned and angry as his wand flew out of his hand, landing beside Harry's hand. Lifting himself off the floor, he wrapped the fingers of his left hand around it, squeezing it tightly.

  


"Silly boy. You think a simple trick like that is going to throw me off?" Voldemort scoffed, his high laughter filling the room. 

  


"No, but maybe this will," Harry replied as he pushed down on the center of the wand and it began to split. He pushed harder, and it broke in two. A shower of silver sparks emitted from its core.

  


Voldemort glared at him, his smile faltering. He laughed softly, advancing on Harry.

  


_So hold me when I'm here, right me when I'm wrong,_

_hold me when I'm scared, I won't always be there,_

_so love me when I'm gone . . ._

  


"Impedimenta!" Harry shouted. Voldemort continued toward him, the spell completely useless. Harry pushed back the wave of panic that swept through him, trying to focus on a spell that could help him. The pain in his scar grew.

  


"Incendio!"

  


The hem of Voldemort's robes caught fire, and he looked startled, but quickly regained his composure. Harry realized that none of the spells he had learned in school were going to help him. He thought back to all of the nights he had spent in the Restricted section of the library, researching Dark magic. There had been several very powerful spells listed, but Harry had told himself he would never need them. He had been wrong.

  


_But when your education x-ray cannot see under my skin,_

_I won't tell you a damn thing that I would not tell my friends._

_Roaming through this darkness, I'm alive but I'm alone._

_Part of me is fighting this, but part of me is gone . . ._

  


His mind settled on a spell. It was his last hope. His death for Voldemort's death. The Sacrifice. He knew it had only been attempted once, and it had been successful. It could only work if the two parties were linked somehow. Harry took a deep breath as Voldemort came closer. _Goodbye Ron. Goodbye Hermione. Take care of one another, as you always took care of me. Never forget me. I'm sorry._

  


_ Hold me when I'm here, right me when I'm wrong,_

_hold me when I'm scared, and love me when I'm gone,_

_everything I am, and everything in me wants to be the one you wanted me to be._

_I'll never let you down and even if I could,_

_I'd give up everything if only for your good . . ._

  


His wand pointed first at Voldemort, then at himself, drawing a gold circle around them. Voldemort was only a foot from him now. Harry waited for the circle to dissolve into the ground around them, leaving its light. Voldemort was only inches away. He focused his mind completely on the task at hand. Voldemort was beside him now, his long, spider-like hands reaching for Harry's throat. 

  


_So hold me when I'm here, right me when I'm wrong ,_

_hold me when I'm scared, I won't always be there,_

_so love me when I'm gone, love me when I'm gone . . ._

  


Voldemort's icy hands wrapped around Harry's throat, and he felt a bust of white hot pain. He clenched his teeth against crying out, struggling to keep his mind clear. He placed his hands over the thin white ones, and felt magic buzzing through him. 

  


_Hold me when I'm here, right me when I'm wrong,_

_hold me when I'm scared and love me when I'm gone._

_Everything I am, and everything in me wants to be the one you wanted me to be._

_I'll never let you down, and even if I could,_

_I'd give up everything if only for your good._

_So hold me when I'm here, right me when I'm wrong, _

_hold me when I'm scared, I won't always be there._

_So love me when I'm gone . . ._

  


"Sacrificium!" Harry shouted, maintaining his grip on Voldemort's arms. The red eyes widened as he realized what was happening. He tried to let go, but the magic bound them together. Harry felt the life draining out of both of them. His breathing slowed, as did his pulse. He could make out a point of golden light ahead of him, getting closer. It grew and grew until he was swimming in it. Then all was still.

  


_Love me when I'm gone . . ._

  
  
  



End file.
